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King Neptune and his lit trident, about to roast Mr. Krabs in the spongebob movie

Chest muscles, fried crab, and deflected attacks

Spongebob Astrology: Mars in Cancer

The scene from the Spongebob movie where David Hasselhoff returns Spongebob and Patrick to Bikini Bottom has many symbolic nods to Mars in Cancer. This is a transcript of the scene, along with an explanation of its symbolism. Although David Hasselhoff doesn’t have Mars in Cancer, he does have Cancer placements (Uranus, Sun, Venus), while his Mars remains in another water sign (its home sign of Scorpio). No wonder he’s known for his role on Baywatch.

DAVID: “Okay fellas, this is where you get off, Bikini Bottom is directly below.”

SPONGEBOB: “But we’ll never be able to float down in time [to save Mr. Krabs!]”

DAVID: “Who said anything about floating?”

VOICEOVER: “Initiating launch sequence…”

SPONGEBOB: “What the…?”

David’s body erects itself above the water unnaturally, and his chest muscles begin to separate. In Medical Astrology, Cancer is the sign that rules the chest/breasts. Mars is the planet that rules movement and our muscles. So Mars in Cancer can be translated to “chest muscles.”

SPONGEBOB: “Did you see that??”

PATRICK: “The control…”

DAVID (Grabbing them): “All hands on deck!”

He places them in between his chest muscles and begins to squeeze his chest muscles together with unnatural force.

VOICEOVER: “Ten seconds to lift off…10…9…8…7…6…”

NEPTUNE: “Eugene Krabs! The time has come…. For you to fry!” (he lights his trident on fire).

Cancer is symbolized by the Crab/Krab, and Mars is the planet that rules fire. Mars in Cancer can be translated to “fried crab.”

VOICEOVER: “5…4…3…2…1…”

The chest muscles contract and shoot Spongebob and Patrick with projectile force into the water. Mars rules speed and projectile force, and Cancer is a water sign. When you think about Mars “fallen” in Cancer, think about how much slower you move when you are in the water versus when you are on dry land.

At the exact moment that Neptune fires his trident flames at Mr. Krabs, is the exact same moment that Spongebob, Patrick, and the crown are projected in line of the trident fire. The crown reflects the attack, protecting Mr. Krabs. Mars rules attack, war, and fire(arms). Cancer, ruled by the Moon (who reflects the light of the Sun), is the sign that rules mirrors and reflection. It is also the “royalty” of the Zodiac, or the “Queen” along with Leo, the “King.” So a crown being the object to reflect the attack symbolizes the royalty of Cancer and the divine, regal intervention of protection that Cancer provides.

Above the water, David Hasselhoff is relaxing, proud of himself for doing good.

DAVID: “Ya done good Hasselhoff, ya done good…”

The deflected trident fire shoots straight up through the surface of the water, frying Hasselhoff to a crisp. This is a great example of Mars “fallen” in Cancer, which talks not only about being protected by having attacks reflected, but also falling victim to crossfire or deflected bullets. No good deed goes unpunished. The painful karma of getting enmeshed in someone else’s battles.

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